Why Good Women Have Extra-marital Affairs


Marriage is without doubt a beautiful thing but just like a double edged sword; it has its dark sides as well, which often times are constituted by the actions or inactions of the parties involved.

Every sane person will tell you that the love of a woman runs real deep but this same love when rotated at an angle of say 180 degrees could be truly disastrous and something every man should be scared of.

Women don’t just cheat; most times they’re pushed into doing so. Like I earlier on stated, this could be as a result of the action… that is what their husband must have done wrong; or inaction… that is something their husband ought to do but failed to.

Some of the notable factors which drive married women into cheating are:

1.      Disrespect: Respect ought to be a very integral part of every relationship and marriage, in marriages where this is absent or even insufficient; the wife goes looking for it outside the coffers of her marital chastity. It is important that women respect their husbands but it is more important that husbands respect their wives in return. She isn’t a child, you shouldn’t be scolding her publicly, and ‘shouting’ shouldn’t be the medium of communication. Talking to your wife in a respectful manner does not in any way make you any less a man than you are on the contrary it makes her even love and cherish you more as her hero.

2.      Lack of Love: This may be a particularly big and confusing point to highlight but I’ll try to break it down the best way I can. While it may sound normal that every man loves his wife, it is still common sight to see men who don’t love their wives. Some may actually love their wives but lack the know-how in communicating and expressing this love. It is totally ok to always tell your wife how much you love her, but it is even better you show her the extent to which your love for her runs. This can be achieved by buying gifts for her, embracing her family, assisting with domestic chores, offering quality advice that will build her up as a person and shaping her to be the woman you would cherish. When love is insufficient in any marriage, the woman will always look for a way to augment that supply of love and trust me, there are over 101 men out there that are ready to fill the space or at least pretend to, so they could have a taste of her cookie jar.

3.      Lack of Trust: Trust is about the most volatile ingredient in any relationship, hard to build but very easy to lose or break. For your wife, trust is a better gift than love because we can love those we don’t trust, but those we trust, we most definitely love as well. It is not very appropriate to always police your wife about, avail her freedom to make judgments on her own and trust that she would make the right ones. Suppress those unnecessary suspicions, and try to believe that which she tells you. It is easier to lie to someone who doesn’t trust you than to deceive someone whose trust for you goes without saying. When she knows you trust that she wouldn’t cheat on you, she most probably wouldn’t want to break that trust.

4.      Revenge: Yes! You heard me right. When you are constantly in the habit of cheating on your wife with careless abandon as though it’s your birthright, am truly sorry to bring you this bad news. Brace up for her as she most definitely is planning something big for you. It could be a colleague at work, her ex, a neighbor or even your friend. What is good for the goose, they say is good for the gander; if you don’t want to be cheated on, then don’t cheat on your wife. The golden rule does say that we should do unto others as we’ll have them do unto us.

5.      Forgiveness: This should not be confused with the previous point as I’m going to throw enough light to clear up the ambiguity between the two of them. There are men who just don’t forgive the past mistakes of their spouses, and they replay those past wrongs of hers at every given opportunity. We’re humans and bound to make mistakes but husbands should understand that all that was in the past so they should forgive the past and let it lie where it belongs. Marriage is only wonderful when the two partners involved forgive each other no matter the extent of hurt. When this isn’t the case the woman will look for a way to hide from her misery and this would most definitely be in the arms of another man.

On a general note, no married woman is that lose to want to warm the beds of other men. Circumstances push them into such positions and if men are on the lookout, most of such stories of infidelity will not materialize to life.

Please hit the ‘Follow’ button for more educating issues about marriage, religion and life in general. Stay blessed.

Pictures used are for the purpose of illustration. Photo credits: Google and Pinterest.

Published by Ernest I.

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