20 Psychological Tricks You Can Employ To Win Friends and Influence People.


1.  Refer to People You’ve Just Met by Their Name.

People love being referred to by their name and it will establish a sense of trust and friendship right away.

Example: “Nice to meet you Ebuka. So, Ebuka how do you know Tope?” And continue to repeat name throughout the conversation.

2.  Pay Attention To People’s Feet

Pay attention to people’s feet. If you approach two people in the middle of a conversation and they only turn their hips and not their feet, they don’t want you to join in the conversation.

3.  Ask People For Small Favors

It trains their brain to think you like them even if you don’t. And then make your way up-to asking big favors.

4.  Try To Sit Next To An Aggressor

If you do want to avoid an aggressive confrontation with someone, you just have to take a seat right next to them.

The close proximity will make the aggressor less likely to have a go at you, as they will not feel comfortable with showing aggression to someone so close. I use this trick often in hot meetings.

5. Have Sense of Humour

When at a party or a meeting, crack a joke and observe the people who are laughing around you.

People who feel close to each other will be looking at each other. This is useful for discerning out friendships and other relationships.

6.  Subtly Trick To Make People Do What You Want Them To Do.

Offer someone a choice instead of a command. For example, instead of saying “Eat your food to a kid, ask which plate would he/she like to eat from.

That subtle question gives the person a sense of control, hence produces a higher chance of a better outcome.

7.  Confuse Your Friend

If your friend is in the middle of counting, say money or anything, don’t say random numbers to muddle them up.

Say numbers in the correct order as the brain loves holding onto a sequence.

8. If you want to be persuasive, try and reduce the use of the words “I think” and “I believe.”

9.  If You Want To Be A Leader, Never Act Surprised

In business, act as if everything, I repeat; everything is a logical consequence of something else that happened.

This is extremely useful during crisis situations of all sorts when it may be your job to break bad news to people. Always project that you are in control.

10.  Do You Want to Someone Tell You Something More? Then Stay Silent:

When in a conversation, keep your silence even after they have finished speaking. More often than not, they will start talking again to avoid the awkward silence.

This one can totally freak people out. Tried and tested, ask top interviewers. It is also useful in finding loopholes to exploit during negotiations.

11.  Ask for way more than you want at first then scale it back later

When you ask a favor, ask something that they will most likely reject. Then after sometime ask for something less ridiculous- the thing you actually wanted in first place.

The trick behind this is that the person would feel bad for refusing your first request, even though it was unreasonable and will feel obliged to help you this time.

12.  Getting Someone To Hold Your Bag Or Get Rid Of An Object:

If you want your friend or family member to hold your bag for you, keep talking to them naturally whilst handing over your bag.

Most people will automatically take the bag without thinking and won’t even realize they’re still holding it.

I do this with my stubborn sister all the time and it works!

13.  The Earworm Destroyer

Do you have that annoying song constantly stuck in your head? Well, most of us do. One way to get rid of that song out of your mind is to remember the end of that song.

As per Zeigarnik effect, our mind tends to think of things left unfinished. So thinking about the end of the song will allow you to close the loop and make your brain stop playing the song in your mind.

14.  Nodding Your Head While Asking A Question

This will make the other person more inclined to agree with you.

Example “Don’t you think Teni deserved to win that Headies Award?” while nodding, most people will agree.

15.  Apply Touch When Interacting With People

Our brains are hardwired in a way that we are super sensitive to even the subtlest physical contact. Innocent touching is a highly effective way of building rapport.

Do you need help from someone? Try this trick.

Gently place your palm on his/her shoulder, look apologetically into his/her eyes and say “Nnenna, please I need your help”

Forgerrit! This works like magic. Just don’t try it with a superior.

16. Make Someone Feel Insecure By Looking At Their Hairline When They Speak.

17.  Use Gestures When You Speak

Research has shown that people who use gestures when they give talks are judged to be more efficient and influential.

But use meaningful hand gestures that convey the point across, not some random hand acrobatics in the air that will make you look like an imbecile.

18. Teach What You Know

When you’re studying/learning something new, teach a friend how to do it. Let them ask questions. If you’re able to teach something well, you understand it.

19. The Key To Confidence Is Walking Into A Room And Assume That Everyone Already Likes You.

20. Last but not the least, if you make the biggest smile you can, you will automatically feel happier. Remember your biggest smile. Try it out now.

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Published by Ernest I.

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