Relationship and marriage counsel for singles (common sense facts)

Every Saturday, tonnes of owambe weddings happens and it seem like everyone is in a hurry to “catch the bae” and be featured on Bella Naija. If care is not taken, a lot of single people will come under pressure and depression.

The decision to marry is the biggest decision that most people will make in their lifetime, it is safer to make that decision carefully.

Marriage is hard-work, but so is divorce. 

Marriage is a delicate issue. The wrong choice of a spouse can cause an irreparable damage to one’s life. If you buy a wrong house, car or television set, you can make do with it for a time and after a while, even replace it.

However, when you marry the wrong person, you have made a wrong choice that would last a life time. 


Reason Not to marry,

1. FEAR: Many enter marriage due to fear. Either they feel their biological clock is ticking or time is simply running out on them.  

This fear, makes them jump into relationships or marriages based on the age factor. Some even settle for unsuitable partners because they are afraid that the suitable ones may never come. 

You’ll hear statements like, “if I don’t marry this one, will another one come and even if he does, when?” This fear has pushed many ladies into marrying unsuitable suitors. 

I can understand that you are getting older and it is becoming a bit awkward to be single for such a long time; and maybe you have even become a prayer point in your family.  But believe me, if you have waited this long, you might as well do it right. Your wait will then be worth it. 

Like I always say, if your biological clock is ticking, then remove the battery! It is better to be single and happy than be married and unhappy. Reason not to marry;

2. TO CURE LONELINESS: I know you are 30 already and it can get very lonely sometimes, but marriage won’t cure your loneliness.  

A lot of us need our me-time or alone-time once in a while, some more than others. Loneliness however, is deeper, more psychological than social. 

Loneliness is a constant lack of contact with other people, even when the person wants to be in contact. 

It is the feeling of isolation, when you find it hard to make a connection with a special someone for intimacy, including physical and emotional. Indeed, many people get married because loneliness makes them desperate. 

However, feeling like that makes one more likely to make poor relationship choices and they could end up in an unfulfilling relationship. Marriage is not a magic pill to cure loneliness. 

if you did not make the connection with your spouse before you got married; it is unlikely that marriage will do the trick. Such a relationship is especially painful because now you have someone around, but you can’t even talk or connect to them. 

Some people are so emotionally empty that they are desperate for anyone to marry. In the end these persons end up in a painful relationship.  A lonely and desperate person will remain lonely after marriage.  

Remember, while marriage is good, and to be desired, with the wrong person, or for the wrong reasons, it can be worse than any hell one can imagine.  

Many merely put up appearances in public places including churches yet deeply dissatisfied and sad (added

Published by Ernest I.

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